What can’t the Ethereum Foundation just register ETH as a security?

First of all, I do NOT think eth is a security. Seems like it probably was at the ICO phase of things, but it’s clearly too decentralized now to be considered a security. I think Gary sees it this way as well

That said, why not just get it registered anyway?? What is the harm? That’d allow it to trade on the big boy exchanges like NASDAQ. My current holdings would be like pre-ipo shares. I feel like a legit ethereum IPO would be huge! So why are we all fighting against this again? Ethereum is legit - do we really think GameStop can become a stock, but the Ethereum foundation couldn’t figure it out??

& I can understand why exchanges like Coinbase don’t want crypto to be considered a security - they don’t want to compete with NASDAQ, but why does “ethereum” not want this? Is it just a paperwork issue? I get it, paperwork sucks, but come on! I’m so tired of this unknown being out there. Resolve it!!

What am I not understanding?