Someone broke into my house last night

I was sound asleep when I suddenly heard the sound of broken glass. I knew it right away, someone was trying to enter my house. I woke up my wife trying not to make noise but she was already awake. “I´ve heard it” she said. We lay motionless in bed as we realized footsteps were coming closer and closer until a hooded figure emerged from the shadows right next to our bed. I tried to make out who he was and noticed he was pointing a gun at me. I was scared to death and couldn´t move a finger. He spoke “Give me all the money you have or I will kill you both” I thought to myself (ok give him what he wants and he will be gone in no time) “Please don´t shoot I have a lot of money, you can take it all just don´t hurt us” “Where is it?” he said menacingly “I don´t have it here, I have invested all my money in a brand new crypto and I just need to cash it out before I can give it to you” He looked at me in silence, I knew for sure he was going to kill me so I started making peace with myself… “bro………. you are not talking about this Squid Game crypto shit right…? Don´t tell me you don´t know…”

Anyway, I spent the rest of the night crying as he was trying to comfort me… He wasn´t a bad guy after all, he told me all the places where we could get food for free and the best spots in town to sleep…