Twas the night before ETF

‘‘Twas the night before ETF and all through the subreddit The moon farmers were stirring, making diligent edits. The hopium posts were made with great care With hopes that green dildos will soon be there. The users were all nestled in their parent’s cellars In hopes that crypto would make them rich fellas. And Elon in his kerchief and Armstrong in his cap Lay on their piles of money for a rich persons nap. When out on Wall Street there arose such a clatter Users got on their computers to see what was the matter. Away to CNBC they typed in a flash Cheeto dust from their fingers into the keys were smashed. The screen flashed colors with ominous glow Quick checking portfolios in hopes that they grow. What should be in front of their eyes so scary But an urgent message from SEC chairmen Gary. Gensler came to the podium with a suit looking slick All crypto traders round the world begin feeling sick. Quick to Binance to cash out their gains They scream to sell as they shout out their names. “Sell Bitcoin! Sell ETH! And Litecoin and Nano! Sell Matic! Sell Storj! And even some Nexo!” Slippage engaged, we are balls to the wall. Sell away, sell away to fiat for all! Fingers and mouseclicks move so fast and sly Looking for someone, anyone to make a buy. The panic of selling turning them all into loons Many still hoping to live off their Moons. Then silence begins to fill the once loud room Until chairmen Gensler spoke with a boom. For many wanting to hear good news They shook as they listened fearing what the could lose. Credit cards max out, loans taken against their cars. All done in hopes that they could soar in the stars. “A Bitcoin ETF is what many had wanted…” “But my commission had feared that it would leave markets stunted” “However times change and so should Uncle Sam” “A Bitcoin ETF will happen even if we be damned” “Markets open at 9:30 and the ETF shares can be bought later” A realization occurs… our tokens won’t crater. Green dildos emerge, bigger than ever before! A sight to behold, beauty to adore. We clamor to FOMO back into the coins. Typing and clicking from the depth of our loins. Then back on tv, Gary stated with delight. “Happy trading to all and to all a goodnight!”